Who is He Kissing?
by AuroraRaeHunter
Summary: An exploration from several perspectives of the emotions, conflict, & resolution of the major Jem relationships. Can they strive for more calm, normal relationships, or are they destined to be in turmoil? Please R&R! Ch 5 delayed b.c. of move, be up ASAP!
1. Tell Me, Who Does He Prefer?

**Who is He Kissing?**

Chapter One  
Tell Me, Who Does He Prefer?

**Rio  
**"Show-stoppin' numbers, da da-da dum... Add it all up, you have a hit! A little... hmm-mm magic..."I couldn't help but sing along to the Jem song playing on the stereo. I was preparing to escort her to yet another premiere. Ever since she was nominated for that Oscar, it's been one Hollywood party after another. It's not that I mind the status or celebrities... it's just...

I miss Jerrica.

I can not remember the last time we had any time for each other. And Jem... I feel like she is _all_ I have time for lately. Don't get me wrong--like I told Riot, Jem's a lot of fun, but Jerrica is twice the woman Jem is. But Jem is such an _enigma_. When I'm with her, there is this strange pull towards her--like opposite poles of magnets, drawn together by law of nature rather than of our own free will.

There is one thing that could explain this--Jem _is_ Jerrica. Damn, that would explain a lot. But what it would _not_ explain is why my girlfriend has not shared this with me--or why she was compelled to come on to me as Jem. If this were the truth, _I_ don't even know how I would feel about it. Things would be a whole lot less complicated, but it completely removes trust from the picture. I love Jerrica so much, and I know she loves me, but why would she deceive me?

Eh, not that it even matters. Obviously, I'm just trying to complicate things--I've seen Jem and Jerrica together _many_ times. How could that possibly happen if they were one and the same?

**Jem  
**"Jem, is this your boyfriend?"

"Jem, what did you think of Howard Sands' new movie?"

"Jem, who are you wearing?"

It never ends. It only gets worse.

I stepped into the waiting limo, dodging reporters and photographers. I was _not_ in the mood. Rio slid in after, closing the door behind him. "I made reservations, if you're hungry," he commented.

"Sure," I replied absently. Ocean waves of tumultuous thought crashed and cascaded through my mind. I did not know what to do. The situation--Jem and Rio--had gotten completely out of hand. At the moment, I see only two solutions. One, I could reveal the truth that I am Jem and I am Jerrica. If his reaction turns out to be positive, life could be so much easier! But I'm afraid he would focus more on the deception and lies of the past.

There _is_ another solution. Jem could break it off with Rio, and actually define their relationship as one of colleagues and friends. Then, hopefully, he will actually stop feeling so guilty and start being my boyfriend again--"mine" as in Jerrica's! I am sick of being jealous of myself!

Why didn't I do a test run with Synergy first? Then I might know what to do. Rio will have to find out about Jem and Synergy eventually if we end up married. I wonder what Daddy would say about all of this...

"Jem, are you all right? You seem a little distracted."

"Oh, Rio. I... I'm fine. You know, we have a lot to talk about--but over dinner."

"Okay," he replied, smiling. I love his smile.

I'm still not sure what to say, but I'm going to do something.

Tonight.


	2. I Never Meant to Lie to You

**Chapter Two  
I Never Meant to Lie to You**

Rio  
As our meals were served, Jem seemed to tense up. _Now I'm worried about what she had to talk about..._ I know that it was without reason, but I worried something serious was about to happen.

"Rio, um... remember back when the Holograms and the Misfits were competing for the mansion and the movie contract? And we went to that first party on Countess DuVoisin's yacht?" Jem asked.

"Yes," I answered cautiously. I remembered all right... that was the first night Jem and I ever acted remotely romantic. Sometimes I wonder if I had not gone, would I have such a complicated love life now? I know the attraction is there, but if I had spent more time with Jerrica, maybe...

"I was going to tell you something that night. Something... important." Jem looked as worried and anxious as I felt. What was going on?

"Okay," I prompted. Did I really want to hear this?

"Well, I was going to tell you about... about why..." She trailed off. "About why we could never be anything more than colleagues and friends--close friends, but just friends."

_What! _Inside, all these feelings caught themselves up in a whirlwind of confusion._ What does this mean? _I asked myself. _Does she not want to "see" me anymore? I don't know how I feel about that..._

Before I could answer back, a voice behind me said, "Oh? And just why would that be?"

Jem sighed. "Hello, Pizzazz."

"What are you two doing here?" Stormer asked as Pizzazz and Jetta scooted into my booth.

"Yeah, and where's Jerrica?" Roxy plopped herself down and started picking at Jem's calamari.

"Yeah, she's the one that's supposed to be goin' with you," Jetta snapped back. I winced.

"I don't think this--" I gestured at our table "is any of your business, Misfits. Why don't you take a hike?" They always seem to show up at the most inconvenient times--at least for _us_.

"Come along, Pizzazz," Eric called. "We have a meeting with the owner of that venue--don't you want a performance _Jem_ isn't beating?"

"_Aauugh!"_ Pizzazz screeched. She reached for my water glass and promptly flung it at Eric. It barely missed his head, shattering against the wall behind him.

"Pizzazz!" Eric hollered. "Watch it!"

"Excuse me." The Maitre D had made his way to the commotion. "What is the problem here?"

"Sir, there are some rather... _disruptive_ people bothering us--we are trying to have a civilized dinner here!" Jem complained, obviously using her position for once.

_That's kind of cool, _I thought._ She's actually standing up for herself._

"Ladies, Monsieur," the Maitre D gestured to the Misfits and Eric.

"Fine, we can take a hint," Roxy growled as she got up to leave.

"We can escort _ourselves_ out, thank you very much!" Pizzazz asserted, elbowing a security guard in the ribs as she left.

"Right! And don't expect any patronage from Charles or the royal family! I'm a blueblood, you know! I've got _connections!_" Jetta repeatedly poked the Maitre D in the chest as she spoke. Stormer rolled her eyes at her and left with her bandmates.

I shook my head. "The Misfits..." I muttered. "Now, Jem, where were we?" I remembered exactly where we were, of course, but I needed to hear her say it again before I could truly believe.

Jem  
_This is so nerve wracking, _I thought. _So much harder than I ever imagined. I simply can't get the words out... _"Well, Rio," I began again. "You know, Jerrica and I are very close. Closer than almost anybody knows--"

"Jerrica is_...my _girlfriend, right? Don't tell me you two are--"

"Rio!" I exclaimed giggling. _That would be interesting. Ha, ha,_ I thought to myself. "No. What I was _about_ to say is that it's obvious the two of you are completely in love. But it's also no secret that you and I have had our moments. And, while you haven't cheated _per se,_ I have been a temptation for you..." _This is not going the way I hoped, _I thought, studying Rio's poker face. _It's just not coming out right._

"Well," I continued. "I mean, you're very attractive and a very wonderful man--but the two of us can not continue to be more than friends and less than lovers. I can't steal Jerrica's kisses anymore."

"Jem, I don't think I'm clear on what you're saying--you're breaking up with me... but you're not, because we were never really a couple?" Rio's face was a mask. I hated not being able to see how he felt about all this!

"No, Rio," I sighed. It was so much easier to say things like this in my mind! "I just want to set some long overdue boundaries so that no one gets hurt. Especially you and Jerrica as a couple."

He was silent for a long time. I think I was holding my breath the entire time, waiting for him to respond in _some _way. The waiter returned, filled our glasses, left again. We finished our meals. If it kept going this way, I couldn't finish what I started!

Finally, Rio spoke.


	3. What are You Tryin' to Prove?

Agh! I feel terrible! Due to what I'm guessing was server problems on I couldn't upload my story or even log in until now! I know I promised by Monday! But I tried from about 8:00 Sunday night to about 11:00 Monday night, and off and on since then, and nothing. So, here is the highly anticipated (if not delayed) chapter three of "Who is He Kissing!"

****

Chapter Three  
Tell Me, What are You Tryin' to Prove?

__

From Chapter Two:

He was silent for a long while. I think I was holding my breath the entire time, waiting for him to respond in some way... If it kept going this way, I couldn't finish what I started!

Finally Rio spoke.

****

Jem  
"Jem, I'm sorry I led you on."

"Rio, you haven't--if anything, _I've_ led _you_ on!" _Is he being sarcastic or honest?_ I had to wonder.

"No, let me finish," he answered. "I have never, ever, had any intentions to break up with Jerrica or to explore anything for you and me beyond where we already are. I was using you, I think--not on purpose, but I've never thought of it that way." He closed his eyes and shook his head. "Jem, I feel awful about this. I mean, you're beautiful and talented. There's something _magical_ about you. It would be hard not to be drawn to you. You know, I've wondered what kind of signals I've been sending you. Now I know. Thank you. And, I'm sorry."

I nodded. _He understands!_ I did a victory dance in my mind. "Rio, I'm totally fine--we're equally guilty. Guilty of leading each other on, and guilty of putting your relationship with Jerrica on the rocks." I paused. "I've talked with Jerrica about _us_," I continued, "and she's okay with it. She understands. She told me our friendship, and your love, is more important to her than anything we may have done. We've talked long and deep about this."

"Are you sure? Because if it were me, I'd be..."

"The way you are about Riot?" I finished for him, half-joking.

"Touché," he replied, grinning. "You know I'm just looking out for you there. He's sleazy and I don't want you to get hurt." He squeezed my hand. "You'll always be my friend. I'll always care for you."

"Rio, I'm not _even_ interested in Riot, at least beyond friendly competition in business. One of the reasons I wanted to talk about this to you is because I need to focus. My life is my music, and it's not fair to my fans for me to shirk my responsibility. I care for you, but I care for you and Jerrica enough to look inside myself and realize it's time to get back to basics."

Rio was quiet again. _Damn it, what did I do now?_ I asked myself.

"I... I need to go. I need to see Jerrica. I'm sorry Jem." He pulled out his wallet. "Here's enough for dinner. I'll see you on Saturday for that benefit." He bent and kissed me lightly on the cheek. "Last one, I swear," he joked. "See you."

I was so relieved that all the energy was sapped from my body and mind. Then I realized. "Synergy, Rio's on his way to see Jerrica! Can you help?"

"It's all right, Jem. I've programmed a responsive hologram of Jerrica that will retreat for a shower when approached by anyone who does not know your secret," the supercomputer responded through the JemStar earrings.

"You're way ahead of me, Synergy. I knew I could count on you."

I left the restaurant and flagged down a cab. As I rattled off the address of Starlight Mansion for the tattooed driver, I hoped against all hope to beat Rio there. That way he would not even suspect anything... after all, there _is_ a method to my madness.

****

Rio  
My chest tightened. Anticipation, guilt, love, and relief fought for first place in my mind, each already having a firm grip on my entire being. The severity of the situation never hit me until I had been told face to face. _I cannot believe I didn't realize that I was betraying Jerrica--the woman I love--by being with Jem. How obvious!_ I scolded myself.

I stopped at a high quality florist that is always open late. I selected a stunning mix: dark red roses, bright daffodils, baby's breath, and lavender. On a second thought, I also picked up two separate pink tulips. Those were for later.

"In the doghouse, eh?" the middle-aged florist asked as I paid for my purchases.

"No, I'm..." I tried to think of the proper phrasing. "I'm fixing to build it." I also selected a pair of magnetic kissing teddy bears. I labeled them with cards, one "Rio" and the other "Jerrica." To Jerrica's card, I added, "beautiful, talented, dedicated, sexy, & sizzling."

"Hey, good luck, buddy," the florist called as I walked out the door.

_This is step one,_ I told myself. _I'm doing these kinds of things from now on for my Jerri._

**__**

o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o.o

As the cab dropped me off at Starlight mansion, I noticed another taxi pulling away. _Did Jem come back here? _I wondered. I was hoping to talk with Jerrica knowing Jem was not around. I paid the driver and carefully balanced the bouquet and bears. I ended up ringing the bell with my elbow.

Aja answered the door. "Hey, b... oh, hi, Rio." She went from exuberant to disappointed in 1.4 seconds flat.

"I'm... sorry?" I inquired.

"It's not you. I was just expecting someone, that's all." She glanced at the gifts. "Who do you want first, Jem or Jerrica?" she jabbed.

"Ouch," I commented. "Jem didn't tell you, eh?"

"Tell her what?" Jerrica asked timidly, stepping into the entry.

I set down the gifts and swept her into my arms.

"I'm happy to see you, too," giggled Jerrica. I cupped her lovely face with my hands and kissed her passionately, paying no mind to anyone in sight. "Now I'm really happy to see you," she breathed.

"I brought you something," I said, presenting her with her bouquet.

"Oh, Rio," she breathed, inhaling the scent of the fragrant flowers. "They're gorgeous. Thank you, baby." She wrapped her free arm around my neck and kissed me lightly on the lips.

"Can we go somewhere a little private?" I asked, glancing at the giggling Starlight girls. "There's something I wanted to talk to you about."

"Oh, okay," she answered. She led me to her room.

****

Aja  
I was kind of upset by now. It was already 20 minutes past the time Craig said he would be here. One of only a few nights he would be in town anytime soon, and the night was already half over.

I padded into the kitchen and cracked open a green apple Jones soda. I took a long swig, wishing it was _Smirnoff _green apple. But we couldn't keep anything harder than Red Bull in the house with all the foster girls. Suddenly, someone covered my eyes with their hands.

"Guess who?"

I grinned. "Craig, you're such a joker," I giggled, spinning and wrapping my arms around his neck.

He pulled me closer and brought his face close to mine. "I love your laugh," he murmured. Our lips met in a searing, passionate kiss. Craig's kiss was the only one I had ever savored and hungered for. I wrapped one leg around his and pulled him right up to me. I could feel how excited he was to see me.

"Oh, I brought us a little something," he announced as he pulled a paper bag from the counter.

I opened it up. "Dom Pérignon?" I marveled. "What's the occasion?" We walked out of the kitchen, stemware and bottle in hand.

"You," answered Craig. He pushed open the door to my room.


	4. Give Love a Chance

__

Author's note

I apologize for the delay! My life has been slightly hectic lately with changes at work and getting my new apartment.

This chapter was also a bit difficult--as I was typing it up, I realized the original version was a bit trite and not suiting to the series or the rest of the story. It has undergone several revisions and rewrites, leaving me with a result I am satisfied with. I hope y'all feel the same! Please read & respond!  
_Aurora Rae_

**Chapter Four  
Give Love a Chance**

**Jerrica  
**_Well, he made it,_ I thought, anticipation bubbling up again.

As soon as my door shut I was again pleasantly surprised by a passionate kiss from Rio. "You haven't kissed me like that in _ages_," I murmured against his shoulder. I could already feel a difference in the atmosphere now that we were without the stigma of Jem.

"Then I need to make up for lost time," my lover quipped. We sat together on the bed and he again arrested my body and soul.

I lost myself in the deliciousness of his lips, his delectable scent, and his tantalizing touch for what seemed like a blissful eternity. As we came to round another base, I realized that, as Jerrica, I did not know the reason for this special treatment and long-awaited intimacy.

"Rio," I breathed as he lightly nibbled my earlobe.

"Mmm," he moaned, moving to my collarbone.

"Why are you so... _affectionate_ tonight? What makes tonight so special?" I asked, knowing full well but not wanting to reveal myself... _yet_.

"What do you mean? I _love _you, sweetheart." He looked hurt, which pierced my heart. He gazed directly into my eyes and placed his hands on my shoulders. "_You are my world_, Jerrica Benton," he whispered with intense, bare sincerity.

"Your _world?_" I repeated, struck by his answer. I have to admit his raw emotion scared me a little. This was the first time he had bared his soul to me. His eyes radiated blatant openness. At this very moment, it seemed that if I were to ask him anything, he would share with me in great detail, with one hundred percent honesty, anything I wanted to know.

"Rio, if I were to... tell you something," I started, not believing my words even after they left my mouth. "Something I've meant to--needed to--share with you... even if it were not so good... Honey, I love you. I love you _so much_. Please don't be mad, or hurt." Tears fell from my eyes, beyond my control as much as my words. "I could never hurt you," I added, my voice breaking.

He gathered me into his arms, embracing me tightly. "I know, I know," he whispered, stroking my hair. "It's time," he continued. "We have to get everything out in the open. I'm sorry, too, my love... so sorry..." He began to cry with me--silly, it seemed. We had yet to state the reason: that our emotions were so high and the secrets hidden so deep. We just wanted to be finished with the drama, so exhausted were our energy and capacity for it.

"Rio, I can sort of answer my own question, because I was with you earlier," I blurted. _Stop!_ Warning bells went off in my mind. But I was past the point of no return.

"No, you weren't," he answered quickly. "I was with Jem," he added apologetically.

"And she broke up with you, sort of," I continued. "She didn't want to hurt our relationship."

"Okay... did you talk to her?" he asked.

"Don't you get it, you thickheaded man?" I moved away and could not look him in the eye. "Don't you ever wonder how I know what's going on with Jem all the time?" I couldn't bear my own words. So I left them to Kimber. Without transforming into Jem, I began to sing.

"Can't get my love together  
No matter how I try.  
Can't get my love together,  
Don't know the reason why.

Can't get my love together,  
Can't make the pieces fit.  
Can't get my love together,  
Can't make sense of it!

Why do I  
Keep going in two directions at once?  
It seems like I  
Keep fighting a war on two different fronts!

Can't get my love together,  
How I wish I could!  
Can't get my love together,  
But once my love's together,  
I know we'll be together for good!

Can't get my love together,  
But once my love's together,  
I know we'll be together for good..."

"What?" Rio's eyes widened and he scooted back, sitting straight up. "But, why? Why would you keep this a secret from me? I thought you... we... I don't want to be angry, Jerrica, but tell me _why!_" he pleaded. Hurt and confusion were evident in his eyes. The last thing I wanted...

"I was going to, tried to, so many times. I didn't want to hurt you," I whispered. "Jem hitting on you was a mistake. It was me, and _I_ wanted to be with you. It snowballed, and I didn't know how to tell you... I _never, ever, _wanted to hurt you. I wanted to... to..." _marry you, _I finished in my mind. But my mouth could not form the words. I reached for his hand, but he pulled it away.

"How could I be so blind? Here I am, thinking I know you. Turns out I only knew the half of it," he stated. He wasn't angry, I don't think. Usually, when his temper flared, you could see it a mile away. But he was speaking with a strange and frightening acceptance--as if he had resigned himself to the facts, but not to the explanation.

He turned back to me and looked me directly in the eye. "I could have seen Jem keeping this kind of thing up, but _you_?" He shook his head. "I thought you were above that sort of thing."

"Rio, wait. You don't understand." I grabbed his hand and held on for dear life. "I was _afraid!"_

"Afraid? Of what? Me?" he laughed mirthlessly. "What could I ever do to you? What _would_ I ever do to you?"

"It's not that as much as... I was so afraid to lose you." I closed my eyes and braced myself for the worst. "Now, I've lost you for good."

"No," he corrected me. "You haven't _lost _me. I just want to know why you didn't tell me that you were Jem from the beginning. I guess I thought you trusted me more."

"I do, Rio. That's why I'm telling you now. I trust you."

He gathered me into his arms and held me. It was his way of accepting me, no matter what I'd done or what I would do in the future. And in returning his embrace, I gave _all_ of my heart and trust to him.

**Aja  
**Normally, I'm pretty self-controlled. I know my limits and do not cross them.

Not tonight.

Once we entered the room, Craig popped the cork and poured two glasses of the expensive French champagne. He handed me one and we both perched on my small loveseat. "To us," he toasted.

"To us," I replied as we clinked our glasses. I took a sip and savored the flavor and body of the Dom. "Better than I remember," I commented.

Craig put his arm around me and kissed the top of my head. Endearing, but it made me feel like a little girl. "I have some news," he mentioned.

"Really? What kind of news?" I asked.

"Well, I'm sick of being rootless. I've decided to leave the Bluebloods after this last leg of the tour."

I nearly choked on my champagne. "Quit? Craig, you can't do that! You love playing with them!"

"I do," he replied. "But not as much as I want to settle down. I can still drum, even if I'm not on tour. I need to find out what I'm going to do with the rest of my life."

"Oh. You don't know where your life's going?" I asked. _Is this his "classy" way of telling me he doesn't want to see me anymore?_ I wondered.

"I have an idea," he grinned. "I just signed the papers for my new condo--two blocks from here."

"Oh, Craig!" I threw my arms around him. "You're staying? For real?"

"For real!" He flashed that handsome grin again. "To be honest, one of the biggest reasons I'm staying put is to spend more time with you." He held my chin between his thumb and forefinger and tenderly kissed me.

I returned the kiss and ran my fingernails up and down his spine. He deepened the kiss and I leaned back against the armrest, our drinks forgotten. He pressed into me and I could feel him against my thigh. He slid his hand up my shirt without reservation. Under normal circumstances, I'd be pausing the action right about now with some excuse. Instead, I leaned forward and pulled my shirt off, going with the moment and throwing caution to the wind for once.

We made love for the first time that night. I was not a virgin, but I am extremely guarded and cautious about sex. I've been hurt too many times in the past. But Craig had never and would never hurt me. I actually trusted him. I'd never experienced such electric passion before him.

As I was lying in his arms that night, Craig asked me a question. One I was definitely unprepared for. "Aja," he started, "Will you marry me?"

As I said, this was no ordinary night.


End file.
